The question isn’t whether or not you have lied. Let’s face it; we have all lied in some capacity at some point in our lives. The severity of the lie is where the lines become fuzzy and the questions begin to trickle in…how big is too big? Will it hurt the intended? Why are we fixated on it?
I won’t lie, I have lied. Many times. And for various reasons; some of them include not wanting to hurt someone else’s feelings, not wanting to get into explaining my own feelings, and probably the most common lie, the lie of omission. I have also lied for purely selfish reasons. Saying I am busy when I have absolutely nothing planned.
Most people don’t even think twice about it, and there are others who do it so regularly that it just becomes part of their daily discourse. During the course of writing this blog I did some research about lying and discovered that although men and women lie roughly the same amount, the types of lies they tell are diametrically opposite. Women most often lie to save someone else’s emotions and make that person feel better. When men lie, it is most often done to make themselves look better. When it comes to children, their lies are told solely to protect their own skin, (“No, I didn’t eat the last cookie.”).
People tell lies on a daily basis, and the most common method used for delivering lies are the telephone and through text messages. People can’t see your eyes or read your expression so lying is easier. For me, that “rings” true. I tend to be truthful more often in a face-to-face situation. But when asked to be, I will be honest, even if I know it will hurt.
It almost appears that we, as humans, are quite the deceitful bunch. But consider this: if you were to be absolutely truthful, 100% of the time, how many feelings would you hurt? And to flip it around, would you want people to be completely honest with you about everything? Sometimes a little ego boost feels good, even if you know it isn’t fact. I think we also lie to ourselves on occasion because of that, even if we are entirely cognizant of the fact that we are only hurting ourselves. Humans have become very good at ignoring what is directly in front of them. It takes a mentally strong individual to be continually honest with him or herself.
I fall into the group that feels intense amounts of guilt upon telling a lie. I also live in fear of being found out, so it’s not something I am comfortable doing on a regular basis. Besides, after so many lies it would be very easy to get caught up in the proverbial web. It’s much easier to keep track of the truth. So I try to keep my untruths as close as I possibly can to actual fact….true lies so to speak.
